Saturday, April 25, 2015
This past week, I was off at a quilting retreat and a friend asked me why I haven't been blogging lately. "Is everything okay?" she asked. I didn't know how to reply. Everything is fine, I assured her. And it really is. I'm just.... well, I couldn't figure out how to explain why I've just not had much to say.
I've already alluded to the fact that my marriage of 20 years has ended. That's actually been a very positive thing overall, although it has been and continues to be strange and difficult and just weird. Some days I feel like I don't know who I am or what my life is any more. And some days I get a glimpse of the "me" that I haven't felt like in a long time, and I've missed.
I try sometimes to think of a good analogy for how I'm feeling these days. Maybe it's like wandering through the woods ... they're pretty and peaceful and I'm seeing all sorts of new things. But I lose the path from time to time, and some days it feels like I'm just hacking at a lot of branches and some days I need to just sit on a rock and rest.
Or perhaps it's like what I've been experiencing after getting new eyeglasses after wearing an old and scratched pair for a long time. Suddenly the world looks clear and I see things I didn't notice before and think "how did I tolerate that hazy view for so long?" And then other days all of that clarity gives me a headache.
At any rate, as soon as Wendy asked me about blogging I realized that I didn't want to stop. And not stopping meant, obviously, starting again.
So bear with me as I try to clear a new path for myself! Who knows where we'll go?