Thursday, October 23, 2014

The ideal sewing machine

     I've been participating in Danny Gregory's online "Sketchbook Skool" over the last year or so, as a way of learning more about sketching, trying new things, and keeping myself sketching.  (I highly recommend it -- the inspiration is fabulous!  You can check it out here.)  This week's lessons are taught by Mattias Adolfsson, a Swedish illustrator whose drawings come largely from his imagination and are filled with whimsy.  One of our assignments for the week was to draw something that "enhanced reality" -- took something from the world around it and let our imaginations run wild.

   Well, I started thinking about my sewing machine.  I have a great one.  (Actually, I have several but let's just skip over that, shall we?)  And I started thinking about what I wish it did, and I was off an running.  Although I had other things I should have been doing (um, work?!) I had to stop and get this sketch down.

  So here you have it.  And if a sewing machine company comes out with a machine with an extending and collapsing throat (would that be perfect?) remember -- you saw it here first.

  You can click on the image to see my "wish" items which I've installed on this machine.  I'll leave it to the engineers to figure out how to do it.  The hard part is coming up with the idea, right?
        *   An expanding throat size to accommodate quilting massive quilts
        *   No bobbin; load a spool of thread for the lower thread instead (this doesn't seem like it'd be that hard to design, does it?
        *   Beverage dispenser (don't bother me with the pesky facts like this would need a water line, how would you clean it, etc.)  I'm telling you, my ideal machine would dispense iced tea in the summer, pumpkin spiced lattes in the fall, eggnog lattes in December... Basically, a direct line to Starbucks.
       *   Neck and shoulder massages while you sew
       *   A friendly lint bunny inside to eat all of the lint and fuzz so the inside never needs cleaning.  Hm, maybe there should be an Oil bunny, too.
       *   A device on the machine that will press/steam the seam as it leaves the foot so you don' have to press.  And as long as we're imagining, let's imagine that it presses it as you desire, automatically.  IT JUST KNOWS.  Open seam?  Pressed to the dark fabric?  Whatever.  It'll just do it.
      * And while we're talking steam, how about having some of it waft toward you for automatic facials?  Sew and reduce wrinkles at the same time.

      And then the buttons to configure -- A few of the ones I'd have on my ideal machine:
       * Prepare meals for you
       * Allow you to dictate, send and receive emails and text messages.  Or not, if you want to be left alone.
       * Play your audio of choice -- music from XM radio, your Itunes library, audio books, podcasts...
I've added more.  And I left one button blank.  What would you add?  My friend Sarah suggested "clean house" which I think would be perfect.  Or perhaps a button for instant fabric delivery?


  1. This is awesome! I think "E" would be an auto-post to blogs and social media.

  2. If my machine only came with the throat extension and the entire spool instead of the bobbin, I would be the happiest of camper. Thanks for getting me dreaming! Annick

  3. LOL! What a wonderful sense of humor Diane! and I enjoyed your sketch ---sew-much!

  4. So much WINNING.

  5. How about a button for "unstitching"? Yup a direct line to Starbucks would be a definite must have on my "Dream Machine".

  6. I've been following your blog for some time and just love your quilts and sketching. They are fabulous! I want to learn to sketch this year and I really appreciate the links. Happy New Year and all the best to you in 2015! Hope you are enjoying our beautiful Northern Cal weather this first day of 2015.